it is a huge topic.
Most of people I know, especially girls and women have hard time accepting about their bodies fully. that includes myself.
when I lost a lot of weight I hated my hip bones sticking out. When I gained some weight I hated the stomach and not having the “thigh gap” anymore.
where do we stop? why does that happen?
Advertisement and media certainly don’t help. Our society and friends and family’s comments don’t help. But it is not the only cause.
– one out of four collage aged women have eating disorder
– at age 13, 53% of girls are “unhappy with their bodies.” This grows to 78% by the time girls reach seventeen.
-in 2012 australians spent $850 million on cosmetic surgery. The rate of people going under surgeries are increasing at an alarming rate, that includes 1-2 percent teenagers.
– In 1975 most of models weighed 8 percent less than the average woman. Today they weigh 23 percent less.
When we were born we loved our bodies. We were simply fascinated by them . From the tips of the fingers to the toes we saw them as they were. Each person loses this at a different age and for different reasons. Some go through physical and phycological trauma or abuse. Some may lose it because of a bullying, hurtful comments or commercial and society images of what we “should” look like.
I feel that it is more accepting to be hard on yourself than loving yourself out loud. Many people talk about how tired, how stressed, how much weight they gained, how much they hate their jobs, how their business is not doing well and on and on.
Instead, how about “this is the best thing about me”, ” I love where I am and who I am”, ” this is my gift to the world” . Not in an egoistic way, just accepting and honouring , despite of your perceived flaws.
When you started to do this you will realise what you like about yourself is nothing to do with how you look. It is more about non physical quality of your self and happiness and joy in your life. The body you have is merely a tool so that you can do what you are meant to do in this life – powerful, fascinating, amazing and essential tool that you would like to look after well. (note: when I say “body” here , it is merely the superficial sense of body, not in an intuitional sense)
I am no way perfect. I do have my moments. But that is ok too. These negative thoughts are just the thoughts that come into my mind but that is not who I am.
In our house, my 10 year old daughter and I are pretty open. I love the naked cuddles we still have. No shame, embarrassment and self doubt around our bodies.
I hear her saying how beautiful and amazing she is in the most natural way. I chuckle and say that I agree with her completely, praying that she would never lose that truth as she gets older.
“As a child, I never heard one woman say to me ‘I love my body’. Not my
mother, my elder sister, my best friend. No one woman has ever said, ‘I
am so proud of my body’. So I make sure to say it to [my daughter] Mia,
because a positive physical outlook has to start at an early age.”
~ Kate Winslet, actress